Flipsyde – Happy Birthday

November 5, 2006

Just watch and listen!

You can get the CD at Amazon, click on the image below:

Happy Birthday

Posted in Abortion, Abortion facts, After abortion, Men, Women 10 Comments »

Guilt After Abortion: Christians Are Not The Only Ones Who Experience it.

November 4, 2006

Eight years after she aborted her baby, Madam Diana Ng went to a temple at Sims Avenue on Monday to offer prayers.

With her in the second floor hall of the Cai Shen (Fortune God) temple were other mostly young Singaporean couples at a ceremony to put their past behind them. More than 1,200 couples had registered.

Read the whole article at The Electric New Paper, Singapor.

This only shows that abortion and it’s aftereffects know no boundaries when it comes to one’s religion and belief, it affects a woman whether she believes in Buddha, Brahman, Allah or Christ.

Posted in Abortion, Abortion facts, After abortion, Women No Comments »

Telling Your Story

November 4, 2006

There will be time in your journey of healing that you finally will be able to tell your story. For me it one of the most difficult steps I took. It is not easy to express what what you felt or feeling. You may be afraid of being judged, or afraid that in telling your story you may stir up more pain.

Loss that you have suffered to abortion is not recognized by many, it is very real loss and it needs to be dealt with. You may even need to tell your story more than just once and it will take much courage on your part. But in telling your story you will have a chance to lift up years of burden, guilt and pain.

You maybe wondering where to being? Some women are able to begin telling their stories from the time they went to the clinic. Some may need to say what had happened before the procedure or after it. The abortion itself may have been so painful that it could have made you numb. Maybe the events preceding the abortion where so stressful that you felt that abortion itself was nothing comparing to those events.

No matter where you begin tell your story as it is. Truth will hurt but it also will liberate you. If you like to share your story on our forum, there maybe some one who knows exactly how your feel and no one will judge you. Down the road your story may even help other women who may try to make sense of all that had happened.

Posted in Abortion, Abortion facts, After abortion, Women 1 Comment »

Is embryonic research safe?

November 3, 2006

While many on the left argue about possible “benefits” of embryonic research, without providing a solid evidence to back their rhetorics, health of women is already at risk. Donating embryos is not as safe as one may think. Women are dying and being left with serious complications donating eggs.

Today I came across this great post by Annie at After Abortion Blog, and I new right away I have o share it with my readers. It is great to know that not all celebrities are on the left. Great post Annie!

Posted in Embryonic Research, Friends, Grandparents, Men, Siblings, Women No Comments »

Project Rachel Support Groups and Retreats Information Needed

November 3, 2006

After reviewing the logs on my website, I realized that I have beginning to get approximately 25-70 visitors a day, for a very short time of this website’s life it is a good achievement.

I would like to offer an opportunity to post abortion ministries across the world to be featured on my website. Pleas contact me with information about your particular ministry at feedback@healing-ater-abortion.com. Please provide your contact information, whether or not you offer retreats if you do please e-mail the dates of your upcoming retreats, if you offer support groups the days and times when your support groups meet.

Posted in Abortion, Abortion facts, After abortion, Women No Comments »

Flashbacks can cut you off guard

November 3, 2006

Often women who have been through and abortion can experience flashbacks to the procedure. These can come in the time least expected and can even contribute to the dynamics of relationship. Little things like noise of a vacuum cleaner, can remind you of the suction equipment, music that was played in the waiting room or during the procedure or even treats like cookies and candy’s you ate in the recovery room. The flashback can be even triggered by a visito to emergency room while sitting in the waiting room. Sometimes the flash backs can be quiet intense and can almost “freeze” you up.

The flashbacks can take you back to also events preceding the abortion as well and sometimes these flash back can be innocently caused by the people you love and love you. Unfortunately they can affect you new relationships and sometimes even prevent you from having real relationships. As long as there is something you hide and your new boyfriend or husband has no idea what is being hidden from them, they may think that they are doing something wrong, but the truth is that they are not. I am not saying that one should go around and tell the entire world that you have had an abortion, not at all. You are entitled to your privacy, and hopefully there is a kind of unconditional trust in your new relationship that no explanation is needed. It is more important for a woman herself to understand why she reacts to certain “triggers”, it will help not get get cut off guard when a flashback comes back again.

Posted in Abortion, Abortion facts, After abortion, Women 2 Comments »

Trying to Survive by Judith Evans

November 3, 2006

My childhood was brutal. I was abandoned by my father when I was two-and-a-half. Then when he reappeared in my life again at the age of eight, it became worse. I survived incest, starvation, and beatings. 
I clung to life. It was my two abortions that nearly destroyed me. 

When I became pregnant for the fifth time in seven years, my doctor asked me if I really thought I should “continue the pregnancy.” Abortion had never occurred to me until he suggested it. 

My husband said, “It’s your decision. Do what you want,” and left for work. Naively, I began looking for women who had had abortions. But I couldn’t find anyone who would admit to having had one. I asked my doctor and he said, “It only takes a few minutes and it’s over.” 

Having already had four babies, I am now appalled at how ignorant I was about fetal development. My doctor said the baby–at six-and-a-half weeks–was “just a blob,” and I believed him. Afterwards, before I even got home, I began to cry. It didn’t help. 

When finally I stopped crying on the outside, I kept crying on the inside. I felt so dirty and alone. Something deep inside of me froze, I think. I dreamed a lot about snow and ice, as well as about babies. I felt cheated, betrayed, and manipulated. 

I went to counseling and the psychologist said, “forgive yourself,” and “let yourself go on.” She didn’t say how. 

Two years later, I had another abortion as an act of self-punishment. I wanted to die, or at least go crazy so I could escape the torment, the nightmares about babies, the self-disgust and the degradation I felt.

Read the entire story at Elliot Institute’s Website

Posted in Abortion, Abortion facts, After abortion, Women No Comments »

New Features On My Webesite

November 2, 2006

Now that I have moved my website from WordPress.com I was able to add new features to it. In my journey of healing after abortion expressing what I felt was very healing. After years of bottling up the emotions I was finally able to let them go. I was fortunate enough to find women that felt the same and talking to them helped a lot. But you can’t talked about everything and sometimes I wrote. I wrote letters, dairies- although they have never been read by anyone, they did help to get some things out of my heart.

I have created a forum on my website where people can express they feelings, whatever those might be, grief, sadness and even anger. Forum, so far, is the only major addition to my website, so please feel free to check it out.

Posted in Abortion, Abortion facts, After abortion, Friends, Grandparents, Men, Siblings, Women No Comments »

Men and Abortion: Unrecognized Need for Grief

November 2, 2006

Women suffer physically and spiritually after abortion, and there is much written about post abortion healing and how many women come forth talking about their abortions and guiding others on the path of healing. When it comes to men these area is not that much explored yet. Although men do not carry the physical effects after abortion, some are deeply affected emotionally and spiritually by it and need healing.

The process of men’s grieve can be coupled with an expectation that they should be the strong ones. Our society looks with suspicion at women who grieve after abortion, never mind men. Never the less men do need to grieve. Generally men can be divided into several different categories, they are close tied into the level of their participation in abortion.

Men that demanded/forced abortion.

This category encompasses men who demanded that abortion would take place. It could have been a father that was not happy about his daughter relationship(s), and when she became pregnant he offered her a “choice” to have an abortion or to get out of his house. It could have been a boyfriend that threatened to leave. Few men in this category come to regret the abortion, except maybe some fathers that force their daughter to abort, or contributed to abortion by portraying a “strict conservative”. Later down the road they may come to regret, and will need some help to heal. When it comes to boyfriends/partners who threatened to leave, these will live the relationships sooner or later and very few of them will come to regret, or show their regret.

Men that were “supportive”.

This category encompasses men who new that pregnancy took place, but have proclaimed that woman has right over her body and she can do whatever she wants with it, even if they felt it was wrong. Larger percentage of men from this category will come to regret the abortion and look for the way of healing. Their grief may also be coupled with feeling of not being strong enough. While some women looking to justify their abortion by stating “It is my body, I can do anything I want with it”, many of them feel it is wrong and when they find the they partner supports their decision, they may become disappointed, since in their eyes this kind of support equals to the lack of character.

Men that knew about pregnancy and were against abortion.

Men in this category often find themselves grieving much quicker then other men. They may often respond with anger and even may become violent. This is due to the fact that while they wanted the baby, abortion took place against their will and they feel powerless.

Men that did not know that abortion took place.

The category can be actually divide into two. Men who new of pregnancy, but found out after the fact that abortion took place and men who were not aware of either pregnancy or abortion and found out later. The grieving process for these men can be complicated by the feeling of being betrayed.

No matter to which category they belong, whenever they are beginning to regret abortion they need support and care as women do. There is one book titled “Fatherhood Aborted” that I would recommend to any men who is struggling with abortion aftermath:

Many postabortive men harbor a deep-down conviction that they don’t deserve the company of a “good” woman. As a result, they instinctively keep their distance from women who have it together.

Some guys gravitate to women who are needy. If a postabortive man marries a more healthy, stable, capable woman, he may maintain an emotional barrier to keep her out of certain rooms in his soul. It’s almost a religious commitment for him to protect his secret! Obviously, this can lead to severe problems in marriage.

 

Posted in Women No Comments »

Rape, Incest and Abortion: Searching Beyond the Myths

November 2, 2006

“How can you deny an abortion to a twelve-year-old girl who is the victim of incest?” complains an indignant supporter of abortion. “And how can you call yourself a loving Christian if you would force a victim of violent rape to give birth to a rapist’s child?” Every pro-lifer has heard these same challenges in one form or another. They are the emotionally charged questions designed to prove either 1) that pro-lifers are insensitive “fetus lovers,” 2) or ethically inconsistent, allowing abortion for some circumstances but not others. Unfortunately, most pro-lifers have difficulty answering these challenges because the issue of sexual assault pregnancies is so widely misunderstood. Typically, both sides of the debate accept the presumption that women with sexual assault pregnancies would want an abortion and that the abortion would in some way help them to recover from the assault. Thus, the pro-lifer is left in the uncomfortable position of arguing that the sanctity of life is more important than the needs of the sexual assault victim with whom everyone should rightly sympathize….

You can read the entire article of David C. Reardon, Ph.D., at Elliot Institute’s website. It is one of the best articles ever written regarding the issue.

Posted in Abortion, Abortion facts, After abortion, Women No Comments »